Goooooood Grief! This is a personal one for me.
I lost my father in 2017, thanks to a slow burning, terminal illness that ended abruptly. He was sick for several years prior, but was more or less nonverbal throughout so I could not always read how he was doing. My family ended up grieving the person we knew and loved first, then his physical presence when he passed away. Grief can visit in many forms, not just after and around death: loss of a job, financial security, health and vitality, unexpected accidents, moving, divorce and relationship death. I think most are relieved to pull the plug on this tits-up sort of year.
I needn't remind you of how many of us went face-to-face with loss in 2020. Don't know the figure but must be most of the planet. We actually all have in a way because of the collective grief of mourning a paradigm that has ended, circa Feb 2020. Even if 9-5ers re-enter the workspace and free spirits travel transnationally in the coming year, the pandemic no doubt left a permanent stamp on our mental health and obvious financial uncertainty jiggling the wallets and markets worldwide. All things considered I feel we've adapted remarkably well and most of us have been responsible, respectful citizens, protecting our vulnerable (aside from the anti-maskers).
But no matter how virtuous we've been with our hygiene, grief is sitting on our shoulders. So how to disrupt it, confront it, care for yourself amidst the pain and weight of it?
You can look at integrating herbs such as Hawthorn, Rose, Motherwort and St. John's Wort into your life. Do this through teas, syrups, tinctures or in the bath. They are very healing to the heart and emotions.
Flower essences can also have a positive, transformative impact on grief. Meaning: they are not a magic potion making your woes disappear, but they can help you move through it agilely, with grace, fortitude and acceptance. Bach remedies, one system of flower essences, are extremely diluted extracts of plants and trees, preserved in brandy or glycerin. Some flower essences that assist with processing grief are Honeysuckle, Water Violet, Sweet Chestnut, Star of Bethlehem and others, depending on your circumstance and your constitution.
Honeysuckle - For when you pine for what was and cling to the past nostalgically
Water Violet - When all you want is to withdraw into yourself, it helps open to social interaction again
Sweet Chestnut - That deep anguish when you've reached the end of your endurance
Star of Bethlehem - For shock and/or trauma around loss, new and old
Pine - When you blame yourself or feel guilty around what's happened
Red Chestnut - When you are worried sick about loved ones and the state of the world
Walnut - Great for transitional times, to help you break from your past and protect you from over-influence of external factors
If your grief experience does not resemble the above remedies' descriptions, please connect and we can figure out which combo might help you pull through this time. If ever in doubt, turn to Rescue Remedy, which Dr. Bach created for in times of crisis, when stress, anxiety and trauma are acute. I'll write a post on this wonderchild later.
So tell me...what are you letting go of from 2020 and which pearls of wisdom are you carrying with you?